I Heard A Murder Is About To Be Committed

Is that true? If it is then what a shame.

This entry is dedicated to the efforts put forth in Save Kinta Nature Park fb page. Visit them here.http://www.facebook.com/KintaNP?sk=notes

I would like to apologize for not being able to do more, although I find environmental issues close to my heart. I once even scolded my mother for burning rubbish next to my shop. So I am 'anak derhaka'. Tell me, are mothers not allowed to listen to their children? So when this happens, i'd like to contribute in any way I could no matter how small my contribution it may seem.

And when I decide to write a Sajak, it is normally for something that touches the inner-Me.

And so I write....

Dua Warna Itu Gaduh-Gaduhan Lagi

Sanghitam ketawa besar-besar

Sihijau nangis lagi.

tak cukupkah kawan-kawanku di Lembah Kelang

yang diusir

yang dibunuh

yang dileperkan

labuci-labuci dibajuku

dulu gemerlap menyinar langit

dondonan sanggulku

dulu jalinan denai kutu-kutu pencinta rimba

apa lagi yang tinggal yang mahu kau ragut dariku

aku sudah lihat sudahnya

kawan-kawanku ditelanjangi

kau humbankan batu-batu jelek rata-rata

buat semut-semut datang

biar gulanya kurang manis

katamu mau untung

wahai cucu-cucuku,

ampunkan aku kalau hidupmu

bagai semut menghurung batu-batu

gulanya udah lama habis

apa yang mahu kamu tinggalkan

buat cucu-cucumu pula?

Sonessadii

Teluk Intan, Perak.

*Drive an NGV-fueled vehicle. You contribute a little too.

*It's in Malay only. Sorry but English translation would sound so de la Krapp.

Sonessadii's Top 5 (Volume 1) The Most Overused Prefix To A Thing's Name

Here are the most overused prefixes my research team (which includes me, myself and I), managed to compile after scouring the whole country from one place i.e. my laptop. You would stumble into them many times in a day, even when you come to a new place for the first time.

We countdown instead of up. The last one gathers the most points in terms of customers awareness, not necessarily the number of times you see them.

Here they are :

5. Seri (sometimes Sri)

Find it in 90% of school names. 50% of housing estates. 33% in road names. 13 journalists in nationally circulated prints. For example, Sekolah Menengah Kebangsaan Seri Bla Bla Bla, Taman Seri Bla Bla Bla, Jalan Seri Bla Bla Bla, and pengarang : Sri Itu, Sri Ini.

4. De / D’ / Di

This started in the 90’s, as far as I can remember. It hasn’t stopped since. Used in company names, it means ‘I tried very hard to be creative in naming my company so that it sounds like you’re attached to it’, for example, de’Wajah means what they sell will stick onto your face, D’Mayang means you will be julienned (dimayang) just as the julienned ginger in their cooking, D’Atas means you will be unmoved from your seat the moment you put your ass on their chair, D’Bawah means (figure it out yourself please..)

They’re all pronounced the same and they all mean the same : BORING

3. My

Over-patriotism over the internet domain abbreviation for Malaysia. After the internet, everybody starts using it like they own the patent to it. But then again it’s domain of Malaysia. I mean the “using” behaviour. My.. my...

2. Putra

No offense to the person. But can we please move on and start to be more creative in naming things with other things. All these ‘sempena itu, sempena ini’ things are limiting our creativity. Can buildings, monuments, train stations, children and what have ya be named but with others? Don't you get easily confused with all the edifices are named similarly? I know you’re the CEOs but can you let your creative consultant do their job without listening to your finger? FYI your fingers doesn’t have brains. But men can do a lot of other things with them. So? Do lah that.

1.         1

Yesss! The number one is the number One. One this and One that. It’s the one that you want. One that shows you’re number one in one thing. SomeOne started this. SomeOne who thinks he’s number One. But then, there are over 28 millions number Ones in Malaysia. That includes me, you, vee, double-u, ex, why zed. This One is the epitome of ‘Mengipas Bontot The One’ Culture. You think I want? No, I dowan.

They just drive me up the wall sometimes.

So there you go. If you want me to compile some other top 5s let me know by posting a comment below.

CAUTION!!! A New Cult Religion Based In USA Is Threatening To Recruit More Followers! Read On.

A friend told me the other day, a new kind of teaching, nothing similar to currently available religions is sweeping the globe and he has whole-heartedly embraced it.

Uh oh! What comes to my mind immediately is Jim Jones and his Jonestown in Guyana with images of 909 people that perished in the so-called mass-suicide circa the end of 70’s. And how could I forget Jaafar Patola, the Batu Pahat folk that ran amok and attacked the Police Station some time ago? Please, not another one. All of us must take precaution to this new religion, whether you’re Christians, Muslims, Hindus, Bhuddist, Shintoist etc. Even atheists should pay caution. And your kids. Oh! Your kids. Please, love them.

Not wanting to be prejudicial, I ask him in a rapidfire sequence how sure he was, what the teaching was about, how long it has been around and his family’s opinion. He said he’s 100% sure and there’s nothing to be worried about its teaching. It stresses on friendship more than anything else. It has its sacred compound somewhere in the USA and he said he wanted to visit the place someday. Sort of like a pilgrimage. I say, get real please. The only pilgrimage they do in US is that place called Disneyland. You know what, suddenly Ayah Pin and his large teapot, large boat and what have ya seemed to be walking in front of me at that time.

According to my friend again, it appeared to have begun recruiting not long after the turn of the recent millennium. Initially they pooled up university students because these are the people who have all the resources ‘up there’. After all has been worked out, they spread their wings further. But they were warned to approach people that they know ONLY. It worked better that way. My friend had told some friends about it and asked them to join him. Some agreed, some needed time. But he didn’t tell his family though. He said he had some reservations about telling his family because it just doesn’t work that way.

And he asked me to join him. I said NO! THANK YOU!

He said never mind and don’t worry. I don’t have to decide now. He reminded me that we are friends. And we have been friends since long ago although we rarely met. That’s why he wanted me to join him. He confessed about being devoted to it. How he would spend hours attending to its sayings, writings and prayings. And night time is the best time to do it. And when he mentioned statistics that they are now reaching a billion followers, my jaw dropped and crashed like those cartoon from the pilgrimage place I mentioned before. Whattt!!!! Excuse me, but I don’t see ‘your’ people in robes or whatever walking about anywhere. That’s pretty far-fetched ain’t it. And a stupido claim too. He countered me immediately, that’s the point of it, he said. You don’t go gong up about it. They don’t need places to worship. No bells, no Azans, no bamboo-tong-tong. He said they treasure their privacy and would not communicate with complete strangers. Do it quietly and it does wonders to you, he said.

We stop communicating for a while after that.

Then we bumped into each other applying for a job at some place. We talked again. And while filling up the form given to us, there’s a section that I see for the first time in Malaysia that says “The section below is optional. If you decide to fill in this section you will not be discriminated against, rather it will be useful for you e.g. when applying for religious holidays”. I was titillated and hope very much that he would fill up the section that includes religion. Trying to keep as straight a face as possible and pretending not looking while trying to steal a glance, I saw him gleefully scribble in that section that says .....

                                                Religion : facebook.

Okay, Hands Up Please.

Oh! What is that smell?


I know. I used to have that too. But that's because of my 'recycled' shirt from 2 days ago. And this was in early 80's when we ('we' here refers to the group of people who call themselves Ansara Kulima) received RM15 of monthly pocket money, which went mostly to Pasaraya Yon Sin. This thing is definitely a luxury then. Tell me how many of you used this then? Even if you had it then, you must be the son of a diplomat something or minister of something's son which doesn't really count because it's not fair. And it musta been stuck somewhere deep in your locker because you're afraid that someone might see it and wanted to have a 'calit'. Sorry, I was just being ........mmm never mind.


Now, this is the remedy.

I need say no more about this thing. But I have a tip. Don't just use it under your arms. It works well elsewhere too. Where it sweats most. For example under your chin (that's your neck), skrelbow (that's the opposite of your elbow, he he now you know) and under there between your... mmmm never mind.


I like this particular one because it smells so nice and it really lasts. I sell it at RM5.30, some shop sell it at RM5.90. But when it has its offers, it goes for RM4.90 (normally pre-labelled).


Actually there's another brand that last longer, from a leading international direct selling company related to America in its name and they force you to follow 'their' way, but I can guarantee you, your wallet thins quicker.

So I grouse. Don't pretend you're that innocent. Say you do too. (#002)

I Have My Own Reasons, What Do You Care?

Sure I do. I mean the former. You want to know? Here they are.

(FYI the driver of the white car with the black bonnet is a beautiful woman, with sunglasses the size of Dolly Parton's bra and bra the size of Dolly Parton's too. After a few glances, she just left the car there.)

These are the likeliness of what she would say :

1. It's just going to be a minute. If you want to pass by, just squeeze between my car and that car. If you want to go out, just wait for me. No need to honk laa! I am the priority here. Can't you understand that?

2. What? Can't squeeze? Oh! C'mon. Your car is small. Not as big as my car.

3. What? Can't squeeze? Where did you learn to drive?

4. Look. Don't make a big fuss out of this. I have change the bonnet of my car to the colour and style of the 'now'. I am a beautiful woman. I am a woman for that matter. A woman should be treated differently, especially a beautiful one. Now, don't you think I deserve to be treated better than the rest? Oh.. live somewhere else please.

5. Many more reasons, I can include later, you're not important to me.

Gee...

Sticky Matter

I just love this thing.



Too bad it doesn't really catch up in followers here. I used it all the time when I was a student in Manchester back then. Great in building models for your architectural project, although it may only be good for preliminary/conceptual/initial designs.


Sticks to almost anything.


I use it for almost anything that needs sticking, and plugging too. For example, there's a tiny hole in my car roof, and being on the roof it's no guessing to what happens when it rains. As a temporary measure (according to my dictionary this means permanent) I had the hole taken care of with this. Voila!


The not so good thing is, it's hard to get them here. I stumbled upon this in Houz Depot opposite Pertama Complex and grab them at my first sight. It costs RM7.99 (in US$ I don't know know and I don't care because I don't live there).


Those who used to use them before must know how to use them. Those who don't, go grab one and explore.

So I grouse. Don't pretend you're that innocent. Say you do too. (#001)

I grouse everyday.


I know. It's not good. It spells negative front to back to front, flipped, toggled, whatever.
But I know I have to. There's a strange feeling that something is being released when I grouse. But why?


Today I groused about a friend who, of all the places we could park our car, wanted to park the car right in front of the kuih stall at a T-junction near his house. OK, it's not actually a Ramadan Bazaar. But there were still plenty of people. They have a row of stalls. By parking where he had suggested earlier, two things are definitely going to happen, which are:


1. People are going to find it hard to squeeze between the car and the stall.
2. People are going to find it easy to run and press hard the tip of a key through the length of the car.


I know for sure about no. 1, because it happened to me many times before.
I know for sure about no. 2, because I had done it before.


Hey, I am not the bad guy here, OK.


end.